Time and Time Again by Chris GreenTime is a bitch. You never know quite where you are with it. Einstein argues that the distinction between past, present and future is an illusion, albeit a stubbornly persistent one. This morning as I go through the mail, I appreciate the great man’s uncertainty. These bills are the … Continue reading Time and Time Again
Tag: surreal
CHEKHOV’S GUN
Chekhov’s Gun by Chris Green Having signed off my latest story, I am on the lookout for characters for a new one. A writer’s mind is never idle. Even though Cathy and I are taking a break in a small seaside town in Norfolk to catch up with her family, the search is on. In … Continue reading CHEKHOV’S GUN
Why is a Raven like a Writing Desk
Why is a Raven Like a Writing Desk? by Chris Green The tall stranger in the Duster overcoat appears out of nowhere. He is wearing a broad-rimmed sheriff’s hat complete with campaign cord and silver star. A strange getup. This is a sleepy West Somerset coastal resort, not Washington County. Perhaps he feels the hat … Continue reading Why is a Raven like a Writing Desk
Trout Fishing
Trout Fishing by Chris Green FRIDAY‘Sunsets on Mars are blue,’ says the man’s voice coming from behind her. It is too loud for her to ignore. Suzy turns around to see a stranger in a badly creased seersucker suit has sat down at the next table. He is alone. Is he talking to her or … Continue reading Trout Fishing
The Aardvark of Uncertainty
The Aardvark of Uncertainty by Chris Green I appear to have swapped the cow for a handful of beans. My memory of the transaction is hazy, but here are the beans. It's an odd kind of bargain to have made. Why was I thinking? Looking on the bright side, at least these are magic beans, … Continue reading The Aardvark of Uncertainty
MUSHROOMS
Mushrooms by Chris Green The cows that were in the lower field yesterday evening have gone. Perhaps they have been moved up into the top field behind the trees. I eat my breakfast on the patio, fried egg, tomatoes and freshly picked mushrooms with a pot of Birchall’s tea. You get these comforts in the … Continue reading MUSHROOMS
Travel by Train
Travel by Train by Chris Green I have never taken much notice of the station at Nevermore. In my experience, the train always passes through it without stopping. Nevermore appears to be a place of little significance. It has no Wikipedia page and is difficult to find on the map. All I have ever registered … Continue reading Travel by Train
Chinese Boxes
Chinese Boxes by Chris Green The fire engine hurtles towards me. It is out of control. It has no driver. Conan Doyle Street is narrow and on a steep incline. As it heads down the slope, it gathers momentum. It mounts the pavement. It is heading towards me. I dive into the doorway of the … Continue reading Chinese Boxes
Nightswimming
Nightswimming by Chris Green On the face of it, Nightswimming is about someone’s fond memories of skinny-dipping in their younger days. But is the song really about dreaming? You couldn’t get a more haunting tune or a more dreamlike arrangement. And the band is called REM. Rapid Eye Movement. It’s a perfect fit. Surely, Nightswimming … Continue reading Nightswimming
Shrapnel Perpendicular
Shrapnel Perpendicular by Chris Green ‘Shrapnel perpendicular,’ the caller says and then hangs up. Shrapnel perpendicular? It sounds like a cryptic crossword clue. With the dull flat disconnected tone ringing in my ear, I continue to grip the receiver as if by registering my puzzlement, an explanation might be forthcoming. I record all calls on … Continue reading Shrapnel Perpendicular
In Dreams
In Dreams by Chris Green The girl at the next table in Bean Me Up is the spitting image of the one I was dreaming about not more than an hour ago. The dream comes back to me now. In technicolour. Cinema surround sound. There is no doubt about it. It is her. Everything about … Continue reading In Dreams
No Dark Side of the Moon
No Dark Side of the Moon by Chris Green ‘Don’t blow in a bear’s ear,’ the stranger in the Astrakhan coat says, as he passes me on October Avenue. I am puzzled. Does he not realise there are no bears in these parts? The nearest thing to a bear is the Sonny Liston lookalike … Continue reading No Dark Side of the Moon
Blues Harp
Blues Harp by Chris Green Man Eats Goldfish at County Fair, the headline poster outside the newsagents says. I assume this must refer to a report in the local paper. A light-hearted line to draw you in and get you to buy the paper. Lord knows The West Country Gazette needs all the help it … Continue reading Blues Harp
Ceçi n’est pas
Ceçi n’est pas ….. by Chris Green Tiffany and I arrive at Kemble station, in the Gloucestershire countryside. We have taken the Great Western train down from London and are planning to explore the Cotswolds. We are keen walkers and have heard there are some fantastic walks in the area. We are booked to stay … Continue reading Ceçi n’est pas
The Last Word
The Last Word by Chris Green As I walk along the coastal path early on a sunny Sunday morning, a light breeze blows from the south-west and the tide rolls gently in. There is no one about at this hour. I take in the tranquillity. Having recently completed a story, I am hoping to draw … Continue reading The Last Word
Back in Time for Dinner
Back in Time for Dinner by Chris Green It is Monday morning, but I am not pressed for time. I am off work. An old Tai Chi injury has flared up, and I have been told to rest. I am sorting out things that, in my busy schedule at the kite repair workshop, I never … Continue reading Back in Time for Dinner
Lark
Lark by Chris Green ‘Do you think the lark has ascended yet?’ ‘Oh, come on, Sean! Of course it has! We must have driven fifty miles since you switched the radio off. We're coming up to the A30 turn-off.’ ‘Lark Ascending IS a long piece, Kate.’ ‘H’mm. But not that long.’ ‘You’re damn right. Not … Continue reading Lark
666 – The Number of the Bus
666 – The Number of the Bus by Chris Green Mr Saxx who taught us Maths in Year 11 was obsessed with probability. In his classes, we were required to calculate the probability of many unlikely scenarios. Based on historical performance and the profile of those players currently available for selection, what was the probability … Continue reading 666 – The Number of the Bus
The 16:06
The 16:06 by Chris Green The 16:06 from Paddington is normally on time. I rely on its punctuality to catch my connecting train from Taunton to Bridgwater. I do not like to work late on a Friday and I don’t want to travel on crowded trains so, although it is not the most direct, this … Continue reading The 16:06
THE END
The End by Chris Green At first, the sound is little more than an intermittent background hum. I put this down to tinnitus. But the hum does not go away. Over a period of days, it becomes more pervasive. Eventually, it is a permanent drone. On her return from her counselling conference up country, my … Continue reading THE END
Hunky Dory
Hunky Dory by Chris Green Writers of self-help books are fond of telling you that life always offers you a second chance, it is called tomorrow. This is all very well. It’s something you can look forward to. But what if you could have your second chance yesterday? This would mean that you still had … Continue reading Hunky Dory
Passenger
Passenger by Chris Green The bus isn’t supposed to go this way. What is happening? Where is it taking me? ‘You’re going the wrong way,’ I call out to the driver. She takes no notice. Perhaps she cannot hear me over the noise of the engine. I try again. ‘I have an appointment and I’m … Continue reading Passenger
Odyssey
Odyssey by Chris Green The huge red and green trucks thunder along the carriageways in both directions. There is something both hostile and haphazard about the way they cross from lane to lane, throwing up dense clouds of dust from the parched road surface. The trucks are military in design with names like KRAZ … Continue reading Odyssey
Cover Story
Cover Story by Chris Green A vermilion memo is circulating at the research establishment, one down from red. Red means evacuate. Tension levels are rising. I am glad it is time for my shift to end. I keep my head down at work, but I have suspected for a long time something weird is going … Continue reading Cover Story
The Two of Us
The Two of Us by Chris Green ‘There are no stars out tonight,’ Cindy says. ‘Why are there no stars, Matt?’ ‘You don't get stars every night,’ I say. ‘Perhaps there will be some tomorrow.’ ‘But, it has been a clear day,’ Cindy says. ‘There should be stars after a clear day.’ ‘That’s true,’ I … Continue reading The Two of Us
Chatter
Chatter by Chris Green You would not think to look at him now, but when he was older, Dylan Song was a trailblazer. A dark horse who diced with danger, he flew the rebel flag. Song was a provocateur, an agent for change. He championed the cause of the underdog. He became a hero to … Continue reading Chatter
How the Light Gets In
How the Light Gets In by Chris Green The sign ought to have been enough to trigger alarm bells. Zitt – Twinned with Area 51, it said. But at the time, it didn’t make an impression. Area 51 was just a remote place in the US that I had heard referenced in random conversations. I … Continue reading How the Light Gets In
Listening Centre
Listening Centre by Chris Green Sandwich Man walks past our house at five to six every evening, just before the end of Pointless on television. He passes on his way home from the listening centre where he works. From the back entrance of the base, Cheltenham Close offers a short cut to Connery Way and … Continue reading Listening Centre
Time Out
Time Out by Chris Green The train has never been this late. It is nearly 10 o’clock. Max has been waiting over an hour. He has been through most of the Thelonious Monk selections on his iPhone. He may have missed something, but so far as he can tell, there have been no announcements giving … Continue reading Time Out
Genesis
Genesis by Chris Green GENESIS. That’s all it says. Genesis in large clear capitals. Informal font. Plain white envelope. It arrived overnight. Probably promotional literature for stuff I could not possibly want. Some fly-by-night scammer trying to make something worthless seem valuable or something pointless seem essential. The single sheet of A4 is short on … Continue reading Genesis
GO
Go by Chris Green I open the front door to discover a large package on the doorstep. I did not hear anyone deliver it while I was getting ready for work, or see anyone from the window. It’s huge. I try to think what I might have ordered. Something three feet by two that might … Continue reading GO
Weatherman
Weatherman by Chris Green I shouldn’t be writing this. The organisation I work for is very conscious about security. And rightly so, when you consider that we control the weather. Security is so tight that I don't know who runs WeatherCorp. I was head-hunted online by them through an anonymous encrypted email. They had heard … Continue reading Weatherman
Giselle
Giselle by Chris Green I am stuck at the Scott McKenzie lights when I notice the car in front of me is the same model and colour, a blue Mazda 3. Not too unusual, perhaps. It is a popular model. But this one looks too familiar. Before I can put my finger on what it … Continue reading Giselle
Can’t Write, Won’t Write
Can’t Write, Won’t Write by Chris Green The Conference Room is the largest space in the Resource Centre. Seated, it holds about forty, depending on how the tables are arranged. Around twenty attend our monthly Neighbourhood Coordination meetings. Susie Kew is the Community Liaison Officer for Camelot Housing, the largest housing association operating in Barbridge. … Continue reading Can’t Write, Won’t Write
Waiting for Doggo
Waiting for Doggo by Chris Green Marc Gospell was trying to accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative, as his therapist, Lily Woke, had told him. Latch on to the affirmative and not mess with Mister in Between, she had said. It was not going well. He was struggling. On the occasions he managed to … Continue reading Waiting for Doggo
Escape to the Country
Escape to the Country by Chris Green Uncle Enzo is planning to buy a house in the south-west of England. He is tired of urban living and wants to retire to the country. Enzo is in his seventies and his mobility is not what it was, so I am down here to see what is … Continue reading Escape to the Country
Nutmeg and Steven
Nutmeg and Steven by Chris Green Before he accidentally became famous as a rock and roll singer, Buddy Holly was a gentle soul who pressed wildflowers and practised yoga. He was the shy and retiring sort. Everyone said so. Not a hateful bone in his body, they said. But Buddy killed my bunny. Not intentionally, … Continue reading Nutmeg and Steven
3:13 a.m.
3: 13 a.m. by Chris GreenNot so long ago, it was recognised that at 3:13 a.m. each morning, everyone heard something disturbing caused the heart to skip a beat. For some, the rogue sound was the tolling of a distant bell, for others a mournful foghorn, while yet others might hear an air-raid siren or … Continue reading 3:13 a.m.
Cor Anglais
Cor Anglais by Chris Green Sea mists have been building in strength over the last few weeks, and this is the worst one we’ve had. It’s a solid sheet of dense grey. Visibility is down a matter of feet. It is foolhardy to be walking along the narrow path. But the dogs next door were … Continue reading Cor Anglais
Jazz
JAZZ by Chris Green 1: She came into Birth of Cool and asked if we had an original New York Prestige yellow label vinyl pressing of Webster Young’s For Lady. The precision of her request startled me. ‘Featuring Mal Waldron on piano and Paul Quinichette on tenor sax,’ I said. ‘Mellow album. We have a … Continue reading Jazz
The Feelgood Calendar
The Feelgood Calendar by Chris Green Charlie Feelgood awoke from a dream. He had been lost in a dark place on the outskirts of an unfamiliar town with tall shadowy buildings. He was driving a stolen car that he could not control properly. The brake and accelerator pedals had been switched and the steering wheel … Continue reading The Feelgood Calendar
Department Ж – ‘a man’s story’
Department Ж – ‘a man’s story’ by Chris Green Officially, my job doesn’t exist. Nor do the jobs of the other operators in Department Ж. Department Ж is a clandestine organisation, with no mailing address, phone number, or website. It appears on no records. Its headquarters are to be found only by the very determined, … Continue reading Department Ж – ‘a man’s story’
Mood Indigo
Mood Indigo by Chris Green I am out in the back, struggling over a spreadsheet, when I hear the bell ring. I cannot see the woman who has come into the shop, but it appears she can see me. ‘Have you got Soul Junction by Red Garland?’ she calls out. ‘If I have, it’ll be … Continue reading Mood Indigo
Odds
Odds by Chris Green Having worked at BiggerBet, Eddie Lovett knows his way around odds. Eddie knows, for instance, the bookmakers’ odds of Southampton winning the Premier League are 1,000 to 1. The mathematical odds of being dealt a Straight Flush at five-card Draw Poker are 72,192 to 1. The odds of winning the jackpot … Continue reading Odds
Ki
Ki by Chris Green I have just taken a photo of the blue sea with the bank of cloud over the dark headland, when the stranger with the mirror sunglasses appears out of nowhere. He asks me if I am a professional photographer. ‘Not at all,’ I say. ‘It’s only a Canon PowerShot. But there … Continue reading Ki
Altavista
Altavista by Chris Green Magenta does not enjoy riding the elevator to Red’s nineteenth-floor apartment in Altavista. It moves so slowly that it doesn’t seem to be moving at all. But security is tight. The chance of encountering an assailant in Altavista is small. The building has a uniformed concierge to vet unwanted visitors. The … Continue reading Altavista
April’s Shower
April's Shower by Chris Green Hotel California strikes me as an odd little café. Apart from the curious choice of name, it is situated underground and has no windows. Despite its claustrophobic feel, the acoustics seem to belong to a much larger space. The sound fades in and out and bounces off the walls in … Continue reading April’s Shower
Chocolate is at Six
Chocolate is at Six by Chris Green The brightly coloured bus was there every morning. Parked in the bus bay by the side of the road, in Bridge Street, Paloma passed it on her way to school. There was nothing to show where the bus might be going, and no one ever seemed to get … Continue reading Chocolate is at Six
The Continuing Story of Wet Blanket Ron – Part 8
The Continuing Story of Wet Blanket Ron - Part Eight by Chris Green 1: When Picasso said everything you can imagine is real, he was presumably referring to his art. But could this also be the starting point for fiction? How else can we build a believable world out of something that doesn’t exist? How … Continue reading The Continuing Story of Wet Blanket Ron – Part 8
Lenticular Clouds
Lenticular Clouds by Chris Green Lenticular clouds hang over Mount Dante in the distance. Disc-shaped and silver, they have an air of the surreal about them. You expect clouds to move across the sky with the wind, but these are stationary. Here in the town below, the inhabitants are … Continue reading Lenticular Clouds
Ceci n’est pas Une Batte
Ceçi n’est pas une batte by Chris Green Not many people realise that the surrealist painter, René Magritte was a big fan of English cricket. He discovered cricket by accident in a newspaper article in the 1930s. Although he had a reasonable command of English, the unfamiliar language baffled him. Innings, runs, overs, wickets, stumps, … Continue reading Ceci n’est pas Une Batte
Ben Maceo
Ben Maceo by Chris Green Ben Maceo told me about the clock last week. Ben has special powers, you see. He can tell when things are going to happen. Had it been anyone else, I would never have believed them, but as it was Ben, I knew that … Continue reading Ben Maceo
Wish You Were Here
Wish You Were Here by Chris Green The huge red and green trucks thunder along the carriageways of the two-lane motorway in both directions. There is something both hostile and haphazard about the way they cross from lane to lane, throwing up dense clouds of dust from the parched road surface. The trucks are military … Continue reading Wish You Were Here
The Startling Discovery of Phlogiston
The Startling Discovery Of Phlogiston by Chris Green Things started getting weird around here some time ago, following the startling discovery of phlogiston. The previous belief, kept alive for many years by charlatans, was that everything was made up of 118 elements, all arranged neatly by the number of protons, electron configurations and recurring chemical … Continue reading The Startling Discovery of Phlogiston
Cat Town
Cat Town by Chris Green Chet’s train to Chatton has never been this late. It is seven o’clock. He has been on the platform for an hour and a half without seeing a soul. Where are the other passengers? Admittedly, Dark Hollow is a quiet backwater, but in the six weeks he has been working … Continue reading Cat Town
Soft Watches
Soft Watches by Chris Green ‘Google seemed a little under the weather when she greeted me this morning,’ Rosie says, ‘I thought she sounded croaky last night too when I asked her who did the painting with the soft watches hanging from trees. I hope she isn’t going down with something.’ ‘Who did the painting … Continue reading Soft Watches
Where Have All the Flowers Gone?
Where Have All the Flowers Gone? by Chris Green Always something of a wild man, Danny Rocco isn’t the type you would expect to find at a Ludovico Einaudi recital. But the main reason that Danny’s being at the Einaudi concert is unlikely is that Danny Rocco is dead. He met his maker three years … Continue reading Where Have All the Flowers Gone?
Hunky Dory 2019
Hunky Dory 2019 by Chris Green It all began one hot stormy night two years back when Hermione and I were living in Joy Street in Bridgewater. I dreamt it was 1972 and the album, Hunky Dory was playing. I was listening to the album, slowly and leisurely as I would have back then if … Continue reading Hunky Dory 2019
TIME
TIME by Chris Green Time is a bitch. You never know quite where you are with it. Einstein, bless him, argues that the distinction between past, present and future is an illusion, albeit a stubbornly persistent one. This morning as I go through the mail, I begin to appreciate the great man’s uncertainty. These bills … Continue reading TIME
Tilting At Windmills
Tilting At Windmills There was always something about Karl Oscuro that didn’t fit. You couldn’t quite put your finger on what it was, but from the first he seemed more than just the proverbial square peg. He had a pale complexion and always dressed in black, but so did many others. This was becoming a … Continue reading Tilting At Windmills
The Continuing Story Of Wet Blanket Ron
The Continuing Story Of Wet Blanket Ron – Part 1 by Chris Green Fortune has not favoured Ron Smoot recently. He has suffered one setback after another. He was just coming to terms with losing his job in the drawing office when he was knocked down by a hit and run driver on Black Dog … Continue reading The Continuing Story Of Wet Blanket Ron
Strings
STRINGS by Chris Green The goat is not supposed to be in the house. My daughter Jessica has let it in with the cats. Properly speaking, we only have one cat, a ginger tom called Thomas. But Jessica is of an age that she likes animals, her enthusiasm fuelled by a plethora of wildlife programmes … Continue reading Strings
Chris Green Stories 